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My Wife Has Kept Me Around Another Year |
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Written by Scott Wheeler
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Thursday, 09 October 2008 11:07 |
"I just keep Scott around because nobody else will take him," my wife Penny (Curtis) Wheeler is fond of telling her friends. Seems that keeping me around is her way of providing a humanitarian service to the community, or at least to me.
If she truly meant her words I wouldn't blame her. I sure have put her through a lot on our life's journey together. She has always supported me in my endeavors, and I have always supported her. We have always worked as a team on our continuing odyssey
When I decided to leave mill life to take college classes, she supported my decision for my entire five years college. Then when I began pursuing a career in writing - my passion - again she supported me every step of the way. When I dreamed up the idea of starting up a publication designed to share, preserve, and promote the history of Vermont's Northeast Kingdom as an extension of my writing, not only did she support me, but she jumped right in with both feet. You won't find her name on articles, and she doesn't much care for the spotlight, but without her work behind the scenes "Vermont's Northland Journal" wouldn't be the success that it is today. For that matter it probably wouldn't exist.
In 2006, when I was contemplating running for the State House, I was surprised by her response. Although I had never even mentioned running for office she said she always knew I would do just that one day. Seems that she knew me better than I knew myself. In reality, this, as with many of our other decisions, was a family decision since this decision would have a far reaching impact on all of our lives.
Today is Valentines Day and my wife has "kept me around the house" for more than two decades. That is more than half of our lives. Penny and I typically have a good-natured tradition on Valentines - complaining that we don't need a special day to tell us how we should feel about one another. Many years we haven't bought each other anything for Valentines, not because we don't love each other, but possibly just as a stubborn protest against the societal pressure to conform to the commercialization of love. Yet, other times I have found myself standing in front of a card rack in a store the night before Valentines with a row of other last minute card buyers, most of them men.
Penny was born on May 28, 1966 to John and Ruth Curtis of Brownington. Growing up the youngest in a family of woodsmen wasn't always easy, but it sure does build strong character. Two of her brothers, Benny and Lee (Lee is now deceased), are several years older, but her youngest brother, Lyle ("Bog"), is just a couple years older than his only sister. Penny wasn't, and still isn't, into frilly dresses and makeup. If Bog wasn't expected to wear dresses, she surely wasn't going to wear one. Bog played hard, but Penny played just as hard.
Because the Curtis kids were poor, and their parents loved their children more than they loved material things, many people didn't think the kids would amount to much. They proved the doubters wrong. Penny was no exception.
As some of the region's most accomplished deer hunters, Penny's brothers, from the time they were very young, were known for their sharp shooting skills. Each fall they sighted in their deer rifles by shooting bottle caps, or items even smaller, at a hundred yards. While they take deer hunting seriously, celebrating it more like a national holiday, they have come to accept that I can't hit anything smaller than a barn door at the same distance. And my idea of deer hunting is going into the woods with a gun in hand and a book to read. I suspect more than once deer have passed by without me noticing because I was too busy reading or was taking a nap against a tree. I look at deer hunting as a time to get out in the woods, read a book, take a nap, or just to enjoy nature.
My surviving brothers-in-laws, now successful loggers, were weaned directly from their baby bottles to running chainsaws. I have tremendous respect for them. In my travels I have met a lot of "book educated" people, but none of them have the good old commonsense that have made the Curtis brothers very successful loggers and businessmen, with beautiful homes. They, like Penny, can do anything they put their minds to accomplishing. Giving up isn't in their vocabulary.
To make a long story short, Penny and I were married when she was only 18-years-old and I was 20. Soon thereafter we welcomed our now 22-year-old sons, Curtis and Nicholas, (who will graduate from the University of Southern Maine in the Spring) into the world. Five years later came our still bouncing happy-go-lucky daughter, Emily, who is a junior at North Country Union High School.
As young parents, life wasn't always easy, but we managed to put ourselves through college, always working opposite shifts so we wouldn't have to let other people raise our children. We were both adamant in our belief that there is no place like home for a child's first five years. Thanks to our non materialistic lifestyle, supportive families, and Penny's ability to stretch a dollar bill into a five-dollar bill, we have led a happy life.
Thankfully Penny and I look at life as an adventure because it sure has been an interesting ride with many twists and turns. We have both worked in a number of jobs that weren't meant for us, but ones that served as stepping stones as we evolved and matured with time, all the while playing a very active role in our children's lives at home, at school, and in their sporting events. Penny and I can say something that too many others cannot—we love life and we love our jobs. Penny works in the pharmacy at North Country Hospital. This is in addition to doing all of the Journal mailings, billing, accounting, etc, in addition to trying to unravel my blunders and tracking down checks that I didn't document in the check register.
I'm not going to paint our marriage as a bed of roses, but whereas we could allow our clashing personalities to divide us, instead, we use our differences to strengthen our marriage, family, and business. Penny likes her life structured. She likes to know her work hours, and she prefers the comfort of working within four walls. I'm not much into structure, hate the idea of working within the confines of an office, and although I enjoy working long hours, I prefer working them on my own schedule, often in the wee hours of the morning. One could say that I march to the tune of my own drummer, but because of Penny's strong will and determination, she isn't afraid to yank that drum away from me and redirect me on a more reasonable course.
I can count on one hand how many nights my wife and I spent apart during our for 20 years of marriage. That is no longer the case. Legislature and my writing now takes me out of town, sometimes for days on end. Those days away have made me realize more than ever how lucky I am to have married my wife almost 23 years ago, and that she has kept me around for another year.
So while I doubt Penny will get a Valentines Card or a box of chocolates from me on Valentines morning I instead wanted to take the time to tell her, and the rest of the world, about the woman who has stuck by me and her family through good times and bad times, and who has dedicated so many hours to her family and the community. We appreciate everything you have done for us.
Happy Valentines, Penny. We love you!
Love,
Scott, Curtis, Nick and Emily - oh, yes, Sam and Lilli (the cats) and Kara (the Golden Retriever)
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Last Updated ( Monday, 05 January 2009 13:06 )
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